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My Less than Grace

I have joined a new Facebook group, Journaling Bible Community. I love it! I am encouraged there, and seeing some of their art journaling has really been inspiring. 


One of my favorite things is that people often share blog posts that said something to them. I came across one yesterday, and it hit me between the “log in my eye”. 


Now if you have been around me for any length of time, you may know this, but for the record, I love satire. To me, it is the highest form of comedy, and the fact that it makes you think, makes it even better. So when I came across this blog, I knew I had to share it. Not just for me, but for all you satire fans. It is called STUFF CHRISTIANS LIKE,  and it is written by a guy named Jon Acuff. It is full of funny, real, satirical things that Christians can relate to. 


For example, the blog post that took me to his website in the first place was about how to “get out of” praying out loud when you are in a group setting. Now I never have wanted to get out of praying out loud (that I can remember). I have always been loud and proud of my ability to talk myself out of every situation, and praying is no exception. I can pray for any occasion, and never be afraid. But I can relate to those people who hate it, because I have a son who will freeze up in any public forum when even asked a simple question like, where do you go to school. And since he is homeschooled, he doesn’t know what to say. Especially when asked what grade he is in. My goodness! He is just flummoxed. I don’t understand the reason, but I do empathize, because I stand there helplessly watching him turn all shades of red. Finally I jump in and tell them he is in 10th grade for writing, 12th grade for math, 11th grade history, and that is why he is so unsure. 


As a point of reference, the other day we went to the post office to get our passports renewed and the woman told him to sign the form. He froze. He looked at me, and then at the paper. For 20 minutes. Because we homeschool, so he never has to write his name, and I forgot to teach him how to do it- in cursive. And she wouldn't just let him print it. It had to be cursive. I felt so bad for him, and like such a bad mom for not teaching him, and for not making him practice. I took him aside and showed him, saying, “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry” over and over. But we got through it. And now he can write his name. In cursive. Which is good, because the drivers test is coming. Dear Lord, Help Us. I cannot imagine how he is ever going to get in the car with a total stranger and not freeze. So pray for him. Not out loud, if you don't want to.


Anyway, where was I going with this? Oh yes. While at the STUFF CHRISTIANS LIKE blog, I came across this post and it hit me between the eyes. : 


It is about 2 moments he stinks at giving people grace with. You should read it. I was cracking up. But the thing I love about satire is that there is usually a “poke” in it. Tongue-in-cheek stuff that makes you chuckle, and feel convicted (or guilty) at the same time. And I thought about me. 


What do I stink at giving grace in? Who is usually the brunt of my “gracelessness”. It is usually those closest to me. 


Now don’t get me wrong: one of my pet peeves is people leaving the shopping carts in the parking lot. I think it takes more effort to stash them somewhere- like in the bushes up on the curb at Costco, than it does to walk the 15 steps to return it to the front door. Or to one of the 27 cart corrals that are taking up the primo parking spaces because people are just too lazy to return the dang thing. (Yes I am exaggerating. It is called satire. But not really. Do you feel my gracelessness yet? Just wait.) I do understand there are some folks who, for whatever reason cannot return the cart. Like their house is on fire, or they just got news that their dog was run over. Or they have company coming for dinner and failed to plan, so they have to rush right home and get heating up those pre made meatballs. (See? satire, again.) I fail miserably at giving grace here. 


But the more I thought about it the more convicted I became. Because I am guilty. And I will never, this side of heaven get it right. All The Time. I mess up in this area so much. And mostly it is my family who feels my wrath. 


My husband, when I cluck my tongue and sigh LOUDLY because when HE FIXED DINNER he didn’t clean up after himself. (Did you get that?? I am graceless because he didn’t clean up after MAKING ME DINNER???) Wow. 


And I don’t want to hug my son because he doesn’t have a job but is at home, not running around with crazy people, doing God knows what, but every Sunday plays keyboard at church. even though his love language is meaningful touch- I withhold grace filled hugs??? OUCH. 


I am well aware of my gracelessness. And by God’s grace and mercy, I will overcome some of these “logs in my own eye”.


Where do you find yourself in a “less than grace” situation? I would love to know. It helps when we commiserate together. Helps us realize we are all just sinners, all in need of more grace: for each other, and for ourselves.


Next we will talk about Mercy. Oh Boy.


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